These are the notes I received:
- Sound more excited - your character is bouncing from one idea to the other so show some more enthusiasm with each new idea.
- You need to move more - perhaps even stand and pace around when changing idea; move everytime you change your idea.
- Know the meanings - annotate your script to decide what tone to take with each line.
- No reflective pauses - you take too long with your pauses so either shorten them a lot or remove them entirely.
After today, I have annotated my monologue with key notes on when to change tone, pitch, pace etc.
We were also asked to comment on each others monologues today and these are the notes I made:
- Ollie
- The plane miming was very effective and comical
- The rapid movement was very suitable for the character
- Your diction needs slight work in some areas as it's difficult to hear what you're saying
- Rob
- You calm down too quick after announcing Chuck's death; remain frantic until your pacifying line
- The section about Merissa was very comical
- When mentioning the roof shingles, sound more cheeky than nonchalant
- Avoid repeating the same hand gesture constantly
- The line about asking Chuck to jump was great and well delivered
- James
- Brilliant facial expressions throughout
- Don't look at your watch if you're not wearing one in the performance
- When beginning, look away from your watch, pause then address the audience; don't look up at the audience and stare them out as it doesn't match this character
- Lorna
- The monologue seemed much more rushed/fast paced as opposed to last time which I feel lost the effect and attention you had last time
- Your accent was excellent throughout most of the monologue but non existent in some parts
- Great facial expressions throughout (although one from last time wasn't used which I thought was very funny)
- Good movement considering you were seated the whole time
- Charlie
- I feel your voice and posture seemed too much like you rather than your character
- I believe you shouldn't be sitting down as your aim is to rally up your fellow soldiers and it's very hard to inspire that when sitting down
- At times, you were talking to people who would be onstage with you while at other times you spoke to the audience; choose one don't do both
- Very good facial expressions throughout
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